A moment from November

Autumn leaf stones

Earlier this month we made autumn leaf stones. We used PVA glue (mixed with water) to stick the leaves on the stones and when they dried we varnished them with glitter nail varnish. For the smaller stones we used leaves from our garden and for the two larger stones we brought home some leaves from Bourn Hall.



Click here to see the play, crafts and learning ideas blog link-ups we share at. 
Fall Fun Party at Come Together Kids.

Day 24 (5 weeks and 3 days pregnant)

Baby is 24 days old, has been home for 19 days, and I'm officially 5 weeks and 3 days pregnant (IVF pregnancies are dated from two weeks before egg collection). I had my third beta hCG blood test this morning and my hCG level was 456. It's up since the second blood test on day 20 (when it was 138) although still very low for day 24. As my hCG level is low for a single embryo it looks most likely that one of our embryos didn't make it, but I'm very happy that one little fighter is still growing. I've an ultrasound scan booked for next Friday. Please keep growing baby.

Today I get to write the post I wanted to write (pregnant)

I had my second beta hCG blood test this morning (day 20) and my hCG level has gone up to 138 since last Wednesday (day 15) when it was 16 (and I'd started bleeding on day 14). My mind is totally blown away. Our embryos really are fighters. I've another blood test booked for Friday to see if my hCG level continues to rise, but for today I get to write the post I wanted to write. I'm pregnant.

After the two week wait (a chemical pregnancy)

Last Wednesday, at the end of the two week wait, I went for my beta hCG blood test at Bourn Hall. Usually when I have outpatient appointments at the clinic Sunnyboy waits with his Nana or Grandad in the clinic canteen or at the nearby park. This time I asked him if he'd like to come with me to see me have the blood test and he wanted to. So we went up to the waiting room together and he had a cup of hot chocolate from the drinks machine while we waited to be called through. Then after watching with great interest as the nurse drew my blood he told her "I miss our babies. They died."

Later that day we waited at home for the call from the clinic with the blood test results and when it finally came it was a shock. My hCG level was 16. I was a little bit pregnant and having an early miscarriage (chemical pregnancy). I told Sunnyboy that our embryos must have been fighters and he said "I wouldn't have needed to teach them wrestling then." I have another blood test booked for Monday and am expecting the hCG level to have dropped.

We miss our babies.

More goodbyes and a happy-sad movie

Another IVF is over and we're saying goodbye to our embryos. The last two days have been so sad since I realised that they would be leaving us soon and today my heart is in pieces again as we say goodbye to another two lost babies who were very much wanted and loved by me and their big brother, and our family. I'm feeling so tired and defeated and my heart hurts so much. I'm forever grateful that I have Sunnyboy and we will always have each other.

Sunnyboy doesn't want us to be sad any more so he made an arrangement of his toys so we could be "happy-sad" and took a picture of them for me.



Then he made a "happy-sad" movie.

I am incredibly happy and lucky to have such an amazing sunny boy and grateful too that we got to bring these embryo babies home and have them here with us. I wish they'd stayed. I wish we had more than just memories.


Our embryos are home
6th November 2011

Tree Art (Nozy's Nature Pictures)

Nozy on Flickr



See more scenery at Scenic Sunday
See more Friday's Nature Tables at The Magic Onions

Sharing Hope - Autumn leaves

Sharing Hope is a weekly link collection for anyone who has some hope to share or is needing hope. Everyone is invited to share images and words of hope. For now I'll be using the same linky each week so we can gather lots of hope together but even if you've added a link in previous weeks you are more than welcome to add more each time. Please add a button or a link to Sharing Hope in your posts so others can visit and join in. Find out more about Sharing Hope and how to get a button here.



Hope during the two week wait.

{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember...
SouleMama

Our embryos are home

After another IVF cycle at Bourn Hall, today we brought home two top grade day 5 embryos (blastocysts). Please stay little ones. In the words of Sunnyboy, "We love you".

Sharing Hope - Hoping with a fragile hope

Sharing Hope is a weekly link collection for anyone who has some hope to share or is needing hope. Everyone is invited to share images and words of hope. For now I'll be using the same linky each week so we can gather lots of hope together but even if you've added a link in previous weeks you are more than welcome to add more each time. Please add a button or a link to Sharing Hope in your posts so others can visit and join in. Find out more about Sharing Hope and how to get a button here.

{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember...
SouleMama